Progress

Lately I've begun to feel more like myself at home with the kiddos.  We aren't late to everything.  I'm not always covered in spit up and breast milk.  I only occasionally find my daughter getting into something she shouldn't while I nurse her brother.

This box of mini-cakes was actually empty.  She was licking the wrappers

 We have found a few activities that are enjoyable for her on afternoons when we are house-bound because her brother is sleeping.

I boil water and mix it with hose water to make her a warm tub

She loves this box and calls it her sky-fari (like the cable car at the zoo)

Elijah is, for the most part, a happy little dude.  We just had his 2 month appointment, and I was surprised to hear that, though he is bigger than Abigail was at this age, he's in the 15th percentile for height and weight.  Little guy.  He seems so big to me!  I do try to spend afternoons at home, to allow Elijah to get a good nap, but that is only the result of always going somewhere and trying to do something for Abigail in the morning.  Be it music class, art, play group, or just the park, Elijah would probably rather be relaxing at home instead of snoozing in his car seat with the sleep sheep blaring wave sounds at him.  I just purchased an ergo carrier, which is going to really improve his sleeping situation, because it's much better for hands-free carrying than the moby wrap that I used with Abigail.  So at least I won't feel guilty that the little guy spends the morning strapped into a chair.

My little angel

Still my blue-eyed boy, for now

He spends a lot of time putting up with his big sister's loving attention.  It makes me laugh every time she holds him and he looks like this....

while she announces, "he loves his big sister".  To which I always reply in the affirmative.  Of course he does!

Her favorite photo subject

My mom visited last week to give me a little help for a day.  I went for a run while Abigail napped and Mom held the baby, then I got to take my little princess for a beach hike, just the two of us.  She said "I want to do this again" with a huge smile on her face about half way through our trek over the rocks to get from one beach to another.  

It was her idea to bring the camera

A photo I know I will always cherish

She's so grown up, and while I know I am not missing a moment, I see the difference in her since Elijah was born.  She's more independent, which means that she needs me less, and also that she wants me to do fewer things with her.  She wants to do things herself.  I am so proud that she is growing up and making positive improvements since her brother was born, but it makes me sad that she sees my holding Elijah as my being unavailable to her.  I know that is literally true, in the sense that I can't use two hands to pick her up, but there are things that I could do that she only wants me to do if I put the baby down.  It's my daily juggling act.  Which child do I want to feel guilty about in that particular moment, the one who is sitting on his changing table just a little longer than he wants to so I can get his sister off the potty, or the one who wants her ma ma to swing across the monkey bars at the park like she did before the baby was born.

I try to remember that they are a gift to one another.  It's getting easier to see that by the day.